Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Week 8: Day Four - Old Habits Die Hard

Okay so I went to a wedding on Sunday and for some reason, I felt like the fattest cow.  All those feelings of insecurities came rushing back to me.  I feel like I ended up right where I started before this whole journey.  I even wore Spanx and I still felt huge.  I couldn't stand it by the end of the night when the dance floor started I pulled my husband away and we took a cab home.

I had psyched myself up for this for the past 2 months.  I felt really good at first, but as the night wore on, I felt like everyone was judging me. I thought I was over this, but I guess old habits die hard. I kept trying to tell myself that I was overreacting, but I just couldn't shake it.

Anyways, I know this isn't an encouraging post, but I guess it had to happen sooner or later.  Today my the pants I bought for going back to work (size 14) were way too loose on me, so that brought myself back up a few notches. I am still about 30 lbs bigger than I was 2 years ago, and that still resonates with me.  I need your help ladies.  Some words of encouragement would be great right about now.. 


  1. I TOTALLY know how you feel. I think it's something with Spanx- they are supposed to suck you in and make you look better in your clothes, but they do a number on my psyche as I realize I feel like a sausage squeezed into a too-small casing...it makes me feel twice as big as I did before putting the Spanx on! Gah!!!

    But- you need to keep reminding yourself that the pants you JUST BOUGHT are already TOO BIG!! That is an AMAZING accomplishment, and is a testament to all the hard work you're doing!!! Keep up the good work!!!

  2. The fact that you are still at it 8 weeks later is huge. You didn't let such a mental setback send you back to the junk.
    Setbacks will happen its all in how you deal with them and mentally overcome the hard moments.

    You're doing great!

  3. Oh my goodness, thank you so much ladies.. I already feel better. I guess I should be shocked that it took 8 weeks of this for me to have a setback. Spanx are a mental block - it's as though you are slimming one area and causing another to spill!! At least I'm not the only one who feels this way!

    You're right HB, I didn't turn to the junk like I used to. That right there is something new, even though it's mixed with old feelings. Thanks for all your kind words. All the more reason for me to keep going with my blog!

  4. Hey Paddy!! You take care and hang in there, I think you're doing great. :)

  5. I think you're doing great. I think at any size you feel self-conscious about yourself, I know I do! If your clothes are loose on you, celebrate that! Go buy a size smaller to celebrate, it always feels nice when you can retire a size!